Stalking Bandwagon
Ok – let me just say, in defense of Japanese men, that they are not all freaky, perverted, and exponentially randier with every year they add to their lives. But you sure would think otherwise if you followed some foreign media coverage after the recent Lindsay Hawker murder. For those who don’t know about the Lindsay Hawker murder, please refer to Trans-Pacific Radio’s coverage of it. (It’s in the “Society” section.) They link to some other resources there. (You can also check any newspaper that covered it.)
The newest article that I have seen is from the Daily Mail, and features this really wonderful tagline: “I was stalked in Japan like Lindsay.” You can read the original article, or see it reproduced in its entirety here below. (Click the more link, please.)
‘I was stalked in Japan like Lindsay’
by ANNA SEAMAN (09/04/07 – Femail section)Chilling notes delivered late at night, sexual taunts and, finally, a brutal encounter with her vicious tormentor. Another British teacher describes how she nearly suffered the same fate as Lindsay Hawker at the hands of a Japanese man obsessed with Western women.
As the plane began its descent after a 13-hour flight, Sharon Flaherty peered out at the hundreds of green paddy fields stretching to the horizon of the Tottori Prefecture of south-west Japan.
Though the 26-year-old British woman had travelled extensively, she knew this trip was going to be special.
After graduating with a business studies degree from Heriot-Watt university, she had enrolled upon a Japanese Exchange and Teaching (JET) programme and would be spending the next three years living and working in the country she’d dreamed of visiting since she was a child.
Her visit did indeed prove to be unforgettable – but for all the wrong reasons.
In a chilling echo of the circumstances preceding the murder last month of Lindsay Hawker – found buried in a bath full of sand – Sharon was singled out and subjected to a terrifying stalking campaign by a Japanese man.
For five months, he bombarded her with anonymous letters, sat outside her house for hours watching her every movement and finally confronted her in a terrifying encounter from which she only narrowly escaped having fled for her life.
Now, back home after her ordeal, she describes the harrowing sequence of events which followed her arrival as a gaijin – a foreign woman – in a rural community far from home.
“It was the most frightening experience of my life,” she says. “I left the UK with such high hopes of an enormous adventure and returned a shadow of my former self.
“I had never been one to shy away from new challenges and I’d done a lot of travelling on my own before. But being stalked in Japan has left me twitchy, nervous and scared to spend even a night alone.
“Reading about what happened to Lindsay Hawker has brought it all back to me and now I suppose I should be thankful I escaped with my life.”
The naked body of English teacher Lindsay, 22, was found in an apartment in Ichikawa, in the east of Tokyo. She had been tortured, beaten and strangled. Her suspected killer, Tatsuya Ichihashi, 28, is still free.
Sharon shudders now when she realises just how close she, too, may have come to being attacked – or worse. While she speaks highly of the Japanese as a nation, she is also angry that she wasn’t warned by the teaching organisation about the strange fascination some Japanese men have for Western women.
“Because we’re so much taller and more curvaceous than Japanese women, the local men can be a little bit leery and pay you far more attention than would be acceptable or polite in Britain,” she says.
“I thought I had no reason to worry,” Sharon says. “During my travels I’d always tried to live like a local not a tourist, wanting to see the world and to learn about other cultures. My trip to Japan was not going to be any different.”
Having been given an apartment in the small village of Aoya, with only 8,000 residents, she realised she was the only white person in the entire village – the only other foreigners were two Chinese.
“At first I didn’t feel alien or in danger. The Japanese are very polite so they welcomed me with open arms,” she says.
Sharon regularly emailed her family at home. Her boyfriend of eight months, Rob, then 24, was concerned about her safety – he asked about Japanese men and if she ever felt threatened. “I was surprised, because I never took a second glance at the local men. They were all very short and skinny and not very threatening. I also didn’t think they would ever be interested in me,” says Sharon.
“All Japanese women are absolutely tiny. Even though I was only a size eight to ten, I was a ‘large’ or ‘extra large’ in Japanese clothes and my shoe size five meant I couldn’t find one pair of shoes to fit me.
“I emailed him back, telling him that they wouldn’t even notice me. But after a few weeks, I began to be aware that the men did watch me a lot and that whenever I went into the city of Tottori, the local men would ogle all the Western women and wouldn’t look away even when we were obviously not enjoying the attention.
“This shocked me because generally the culture seemed very restrained and disciplined.
“I knew from talking to Japanese people that even by talking to a Japanese man I could give him the wrong impression – that I was interested in him – so I couldn’t understand why they felt that they could unashamedly leer at us. However, I never felt threatened because I was always in a large group.”
Back in the village, Sharon spent her evenings keeping fit at the local gym and planning her English classes.
A year into her stay she signed up to karate classes. But it was after one of these lessons in November 2004, that her idyllic view of Japan was shattered.
“I had only just come in from karate and shut the door behind me when a hand jutted through my letterbox and dropped a plain white envelope on to my mat.
“A chill ran up my spine, I’d been in the village long enough to know that nobody delivers letters that late at night and I’d only just walked in so whoever delivered the letter must have been watching me.
“I couldn’t read the script, it was in Japanese, but my instincts told me to get out of there as quickly as possible. I called a taxi, got him to escort me to my car and drove to another village where another British teacher, named Helen, lived.”
The next day, Sharon had the letter translated at her school. It read: “Hello Sharon, how are you? I’m a 37-year-old man living in Aoya. I’m not married but don’t get me wrong, I’m not afraid of commitment. I think you are very smart, interesting and sexy.
“I know Japanese is hard for you to understand but please meet me for a date. Please post your reply in the mail box outside your house. PS I will check the mailbox every day for your response.”
Sharon says: “The letter itself was harmless enough but the implications scared me. This man knew my name, what I looked like and where I lived.
“Worse, he was going to come to my house every day from then on to check the mailbox, which was outside my front door. I couldn’t bear to be alone in the house after I knew I was being watched,” says Sharon. “I stayed at Helen’s for a few nights before daring to return. To my dismay when I did, there was another letter.”
The second letter read: “Hello Sharon, how are you? I want to meet you for a date. Do not refuse me. Please post your reply in your mail box. PS I will check your mailbox every day for your reply.”
“I felt utterly sick because I was all alone,” recalls Sharon. “Out of my window I could see nothing but rice paddies, and the house next to me was vacant. Suddenly, home felt a very long way away.”
Sharon’s school contacted the police who put two officers on the case. “They came and questioned me and promised they would make full inquiries but it did little to calm my nerves.
“Every night I came home with a sense of dread and I was only ever slightly relieved when I saw my doormat empty. It was like a ticking bomb, I knew there was another letter on its way, I just didn’t know when.”
After another week of anxiously looking out the window, letter number three arrived – again by hand. This time the translation was more sinister.
It read: “Do you like tea or coffee? If I am ten minutes late for our date will that be acceptable? Are you lonely? Do you cry when you are in your house alone? Do you prefer sex with English men or Japanese men? Do you like your boyfriends to be like your background music?”
Sharon says: “What got me about this was that he knew I lived alone and, of course, I was disgusted that he had written about me in a sexual context. There was this horrible sense, that other British girls have talked about in reference to Japanese men, that he somehow felt it was his right to proposition me in this way. In floods of tears I called the police,” explains Sharon.
At her apartment the police fitted a security camera in the front window. But until the culprit was caught Sharon decided to live at a fellow JET scheme employee’s home in Iwami, a town 20 miles away.
“Every morning I woke up feeling sick. I put on a brave face at school so that people didn’t think it was getting to me, but at the place I was staying, I often cried. In my diary I wrote that I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown.” At Christmas 2004, Sharon flew home to Inverness where her mother runs a guest house and spent two weeks with her family. On hearing about her ordeal, Sharon’s mother begged her to stay behind.
“I heard what she was saying but I couldn’t afford to. I had a graduate loan which I was paying off at £700 a month and my job in Japan was my only income.
“Besides, if I stayed home then the stalker would have won, I still had some of my fighting spirit left and I hoped that when I returned the police would have good news.”
Unfortunately they didn’t. Since her departure from the house, there had been no more letters meaning that the stalker must have been watching the flat and been aware she was not there.
Sharon decided that since it had been eight weeks since the last letter, things might be different if she returned to her old routines.
“I took the plunge and after my first night back at school instead of driving to Helen’s, I went to the gym and then drove home. But as I approached I saw a figure hiding between parked cars watching my house. My heart leapt into my mouth and the sick feeling in my stomach returned. Was it him?”
Trying to stay calm, Sharon carried on past her house and drove round the block.
“When I came back round, he had gone again and I breathed a sigh of relief as I stopped the car. Then – out of nowhere – he appeared beside me at the driver’s side and tried to open the car door. I banged my hand down on the lock and caught his eye.
“He was short, aged about 40 and slender. But more than anything about his appearance I was struck by his eyes. His stare was cold and his black eyes bored into me. I didn’t recognise him at all.
“He seemed eerily calm, he was smoking a cigarette and he was only half dressed because his shirt hung open to the waist. For a second I froze but then he brought his fist down on the car and I snapped into action.
“I put my foot down and sped off, but I was blinded with fear and the car went into a skid 100 yards up the road. I lost control and it crashed into a ditch.
“Somehow, I think it was because of the adrenaline coursing through my veins, I managed to scramble out of the car and ran to the nearest house and began hammering on the door. I was uninjured but I could see this man walking quickly towards me. At that moment I genuinely thought he might try to kill me. I cried out in absolute terror.”
Suddenly, a shaft of light opened from the next door. The house she’d been knocking on was empty but thankfully the neighbours had heard the commotion.
“When I saw the light I just ran to it and away from the man. I tried to explain what was happening to the bemused couple but I was in such a state I had to call a friend at the school to translate.”
“They looked outside, but by then the man was gone.”
The couple drove Sharon to the headmaster’s house, where she gave a detailed description of the stalker to the police and hoped her nightmare would be over soon.
But it was not so simple. Terrified by her confrontation, Sharon was offered a room in the headmaster’s house, and hardly dared to leave the house except to go to work in the months that followed.
“I never went anywhere alone and completely stopped socialising,” she explains. “I wanted to fly home but I couldn’t as I was tied into a contract with the school until July. If I broke it they wouldn’t uphold their side of the agreement – to pay my £800 flight back to the UK.
“The next six months were a living hell. I stayed with the headmaster until March and then the school found me another house. I had double locks fitted on all the doors and windows, it was the only way I felt safe.
“I had to keep going to work but I was quite thankful of the distraction. At least when I was giving lessons I knew I was safe.
“At night was the worst. Every time I shut my eyes I pictured that man’s cold, hard eyes. In my new bedroom I planned how I could escape if anything happened and when I did sleep I would jolt myself awake at the slightest noise. I was taking sleeping tablets, too, but they didn’t really help.
“Every weekend I would make sure I had a friend staying or I would go to them. I stopped going out in cities. If I went anywhere I always made sure I went with people and stayed in large groups.
“I phoned the police almost daily but they never found my stalker. So the nightmare was never over.”
Returning home last year, Sharon is now living in London and working as a writer for a business magazine. The news of Lindsay Hawker’s death has inevitably brought her chilling memories flooding back.
“I was shocked, scared and angry. It could so easily have been me. What if those neighbours hadn’t opened their door that night, what if I hadn’t spotted him when I did? It doesn’t bear thinking about.
“I have spoken to many people since my ordeal and since Lindsay’s death who agree that some Japanese men are obsessed with the way Western women look.
“Even slim girls are voluptuous in their eyes, and as we are so much taller than Japanese men and also seem more unavailable, the differences are fascinating to them.
“I can’t tar all Japanese men with the same brush, but I do believe women should be wary before embarking on trips to the country, I also think that the authorities should take it more seriously.
“British girls like myself and Lindsay are in real danger over there. The man who stalked me has never been caught. Could he do the same to another British girl? If he does, she might not be as lucky as I was to escape.”
Thank you, Daily Mail, for this gross, irresponsible piece of tabloid writing. I am ashamed on your behalf. Capitalizing on the tragedy of Lindsay Hawker’s murder in order to write a negative sensationalized piece about predatory lewd Japanese men. Jumping on the stalking bandwagon. Yes, awful stuff does happen, and yes, the lascivious acts of male Japanese are highly publicized. But for crying out loud. This is just sad.
The truth is that foreigners in general are sort of beacons that gather attention. Some of it is cultural interest. Some of it is international “animal magnetism.” (I had a Japanese girl say that about me once. It was odd. And also laughably untrue.) Japan is still the most racially homogenous country on the planet. Being foreign makes you stand out. You know that going into the program. You know that taking on a public role (teacher) in a town. And there are ample warnings about this type of thing. But guess what? The attention, both good and bad, crosses the gender line. Guys get weirdo attention too. There are guys who have been stalked. I myself have had people call my house repeatedly only to hang up when I answer. I have had people bang on my door (as I pretend to not be home), and then wait on my doorstep for up to 3 hours at a time. My rule of thumb is that I do not answer the door if I don’t know who it is and I am not expecting a package. The post office people and bill deliverers leave notes. That just makes sense to me. (By the way, I am not trying to emphasize stalkers here. I don’t feel threatened by those occurences. So please don’t misread me.) True, I don’t know of any violent confrontations off of the top of my head between a foreign male and a stalker of some kind, but I think it is mischaracterizing the Japanese male population to write of them in this light alone.
There are some really serious things that need to be talked about when it comes to Japanese-foreigner relations and safety issues in the realm of one’s private life. For instance, when girls feel threatened, they need a better support system. I am not pleased with the current state of the (non)action that Japan takes when a girl makes a complaint to the police about stalking. [Edit: Dumb, easily refuted afterthought about lack of police contact was here. Corrected by Kathy in comments. Thanks! And whoops!] The general rule seems to be that action is taken once physical threat or injury has occurred. Yeah, that wouldn’t make me feel safe either, so I can only imagine that women would feel the same way.
Girls on the JET Programme, what are your thoughts about this? I don’t want to make light of a serious subject, but I really feel that Japanese men are getting the raw end of this deal. When it comes down to it, crime is crime – whether physiognomy and gender figure into a stalking victim’s profile or not is irrelevant to that. And if it is related, I suppose that it qualifies as the evil twin of hate crimes in the states. Infatuation crimes? I don’t know. If stalking is a problem in Japan, they should work on it, for the sake of Japanese women as well as foreign women. Anyway, please offer up your thoughts. My take is purely the product of my personal experience, study, and beliefs – and as such, is pretty subjective. Duh.
Oh – and to clear up one really egregious error, I’d like to point out that 外人 (gaijin) is the abbreviated form of 外国人 (gaikokujin). The original term means “person from another country” or “foreigner.” The abbreviated form means “outsider.” Whether or not this is an offensive word is up for debate among both the Japanese and foreign population. However, that it does not mean “foreign woman” is not. Nice fact checking.
